So this is my coat of arms, pretty nifty isn't it? I sure think so. There's a lot to talk about here, but first off just let me say that the only materials I had were a week old newspaper, a couple of cereal boxes I found in the recycling bin, and my very poor artistic talent. And some Elmer's glue. That's all that I used to portray the aspects of my personality. Given these setbacks, I think I can say I didn't do too crappy of a job.
To begin with, we have what I would do with $40 if I found it on the street. Obviously, I'm some sort of sick-minded kleptomaniac, because as you can tell from my poorly drawn diagram, I would blatantly disregard the fact that this could be somebody else's money, and put it in my pocket, in order to pay for a lovely sushi dinner for two.
Next, there's this balding guy half submerged in water, I'm not too sure what that's all about, actually. Maybe it's how feel about school, without the balding.
To the right of my coat, you can lay your pretty little eyeballs on what animal I would be. I decided on a great dane, because I could find a lot of pictures of great danes. Scooby-doo and Marmaduke are great danes, and they're undoubtedly awesome characters. And look at that other great dane, it made that hippy's mind explode! How cool is that? I wish I hippies minds exploded in my presence, that would be ridiculous.
To the lower right you can see my heritage, a bar of Irish spring soap. Don't give me any jive for that, I'm Irish, and I had limited materials. Very limited. The hairy man running from a mammoth also represents my heritage, as we all descended from the same hairy, stinky, mammoth-hunting ancestors, and in the end that's all that really matters, we're all basically the same.
The cut off torsos and upper-lower-bodies of assorted running people represents a significant accomplishment in my life. I've actually managed to get my butt outside and do some physical activity, which I know isn't easy- I'd rather watch television. But I got around to running competitively, and what do you know, I'm not half bad I guess. I work hard and blah blah dedication yadda yadda commitment.
Now you may look at the Buddha statue. Buddha was the man, don't you say otherwise. He represents a goal, and that is enlightenment, in one form or another, I hope I'll get there, whether by the way of some hokey eastern religion or just my own life experiences, Buddha better save a spot under that tree for me because I'm coming.
The Jazzy-jazz saxophone and dancing what-not pictures symbolize what I would do with one year to live and unlimited success. I would become a world famous jazz musician, because why the heck not? It's a completely different life than the one I know now so why not give it a try? Besides, with unlimited success I could change the face of music forever, and then when I die (as apparently I am doomed to do, as a price of my success, why did I make a that deal with Satan?) my estate will become inevitably rich, as so happens when artists die.
By now you've probably noticed that very dorky looking individual who looks "totally stoked" to be in the back of a jeep with 4 (yeah 4, but only one would fit) scary looking Middle Eastern men with guns. This guy is doing what I want to do when I "grow up", traveling all over the world, breaking cultural boundaries, visiting various places and people, and really just looking at the world as a whole, all the while looking totally stoked and dorky and loving every second of it.
That poorly drawn treehouse diagram represents my idea of "the life". A smiley boy, a smiley girl, a treehouse, and some girafffes and monkeys, truly, what more could one ask for?
Let's not forget my color, It's a light green, or "verde" as they might say in Spanish speaking countries. Green is natural, and green is pretty, both of which I like (and am? maybe.) The sea is green , the grass is green, trees, nature in general, lights that tell you to go are green, Punk kid's hair is green, and the Statue of Liberty. Green is a good color. But so is blue, but I didn't exactly have that crayon.
And the words, what the heck do they mean? They represent my unfortunate propensity for indecision, yet at the same time the word "maybe", taking up much more space than "yes" and "no" represents how so much in the world is not absolute.
FIN.